Why am I getting such bad matches?

Dear Cupid, I have tried online dating SO many times and I am so sick of not getting any good matches, what am I doing wrong? I feel like giving up but I am scared, I don't want to be alone forever :(

Welcome to the reality of online dating... It can be a tough thing to use but there are so many benefits. I will break it down and hopefully my advice will help you reconsider OLD and see how it can work for you. 

Firstly, in general online dating is pratically the only way to meet someone in 2021 given endless lockdowns and restrictions, so from that point of view only of course there is a point! It allows you to filter people you match with specific to your interests/beliefs/passions all within your local area. You can message, video chat or arrange a (socially distanced) meeting, and all will be a step towards finding love. But remember, you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your Prince.

Secondly, how many dating apps are you using? It is best to use one and stick to it allowing the algorithms to work in your favour. Take our quiz to find out which dating app is right for you! Patience is vital with online dating. You do have to weed through profiles you may have no interest in (depending on your choosen platform) but it is also good to have an open mind. Things you thought you really wanted in a partner may turn out to not be as important, and you may reconsider things you once thought a deal breaker. Also be honest about what you want. You can make this abundantly clear in your profile, this will also allow potential matches to see if this works for them too - a self selection process - and avoids time wasters!

What are your photos like? Is there a difference between what you want to attract and what you are attracting? What impression do your photos give off to other users? By using DATEnhance you can see how good your photos are, how people perceive you and go on to get advice on what to alter. It may seem superfical and shallow at first, but your photos are the main selling point of your profile and so are vital to success. As humans we do make snap judgements and so it is important to always make a good impression. 

After sorting our your profile, are you sending messages? Regardless of gender or sexual orientation, never expect someone else to message first - if you want it go for it! Start with something endearing and perhaps related to their profile for a higher chance of reply. If you do not receive a response do not dwell on it, they may be inactive or just not interested but keep going with your head up. 

Rejection is part-and-parcel with online dating, but it is just as common in dating IRL. The two are very similar, if you meet someone in a bar they may reject you just the same or you could have a great conversation from the get-go. Life is about taking risks and if you want something enough you have to go after it! Putting effort into online dating is the best way to guarantee succes - good luck out there.